Ms. Pines, like most grandparents, has delighted in watching her grandchildren grow. Unlike most grandparents, though, Ms. Pines is the sole caregiver for four of her grandchildren. Raising these children has brought Ms. Pines countless moments of laughter and joy, but this unexpected journey has also often been difficult to navigate.
After bringing up four sons of her own, Ms. Pines never thought she would find herself raising young children again. But when one of her sons died, Ms. Pines stepped up to care for his children. “Me and the kids needed each other,” Ms. Pines says.
Ms. Pines has been determined to create a stable and loving household for her grandchildren. With a fixed income and mounting medical bills though, providing for four children in her retirement years has been no easy task.
“It was hard trying to raise these grandkids. My light bills and everything were getting out of control,” Ms. Pines says.
At church one day, a fellow parishioner familiar with Ms. Pines’ situation handed her the phone number for the Catholic Community Services (CCS) Kinship program. The Kinship program provides assistance to kinship caregivers who cannot access the formalized support services provided to foster parents. Kinship caregivers include grandparents, aunts, uncles, and other relatives or close friends who raise children when circumstances prevent their parents from doing so.
| “They have been there from the beginning.” Ms. Pines, Kinship Caregiver
Across Washington, there are more than 47,000 children being raised by relatives. Kinship families help children stay connected to family and culture, and studies show that children raised in kinship families fare better than children in the foster care system. Benefits of kinship care include improved behavioral outcomes, success in education, and better mental health. Last year, the CCS Kinship program in King County helped over 350 families navigate the kinship journey with services including financial support, information, referrals to resources, and more.
Ms. Pines was skeptical when she first learned about the Kinship program, uncertain that they would understand the complexity of her situation. A few months after learning about the Kinship program, Ms. Pines received a $600 electricity bill in the mail. Unable to afford the bill herself, Ms. Pines decided to make a call to CCS. The Kinship program quickly stepped in, covering the bill and helping provide other essentials for her grandchildren.
“That helped me relax,” Ms. Pines says. “The kids needed things because they came with nothing, and Kinship helped me put clothes on them and food in my house. They have been there from the beginning.”
Many kinship caregivers, like Ms. Pines, were never planning on taking on primary caregiving roles and often lack the financial resources to cover the expenses of raising children. The Kinship program provides funding to help caregivers afford expenses such as rent, utilities, food, clothing, transportation, and hygiene items. Additionally, the Kinship program can connect caregivers with resources to help navigate complex legal processes including minor guardianship rights.
| “She’s also a blessing to us.” Suzanne, Kinship Staff
Alongside these financial and legal resources, the Kinship program strives to ease the load of the emotional burdens kinship families often carry. Many kinship families are formed as a result of traumatic circumstances, such as the death of a loved one or family struggles with substance use disorder. The Kinship program organizes support groups and provides referrals to mental health programs, while staff offer listening ears to caregivers.
For Ms. Pines, Kinship program employees Suzanne and Cynthia have served as dependable sources of support and compassion. “They’re more than just helpers,” Ms. Pines says. “They can become friends.”
Suzanne feels grateful that she has had the opportunity to walk alongside Ms. Pines on her kinship journey. “Some of it was really hard, and I feel privileged that I had the opportunity to share resources and help open some doors that helped with stabilization for her,” Suzanne says. “Often, I think that she forgets that she’s also a blessing to us when she calls.”
Suzanne and her husband are kinship caregivers themselves, and her own experiences allow her insight into the unique challenges kinship caregivers face.
“Caregivers come to us feeling very alone,” Suzanne says. “Relatives raising kids often are kind of isolated because we’re not the parents, so you don’t really fit in with the other kids’ parents at school. We’re grandmas, but we’re not really getting the role of grandmas.”
| “I get to breathe a little bit.” Ms. Pines
Now that Ms. Pines knows she has the Kinship program to lean on, she no longer faces constant worry about her ability to provide for her grandchildren.
“It’s a brand-new me. I get to breathe a little bit. I know that everything is going to be alright,” Ms. Pines says, adding that the kids are also thriving.
Ms. Pines now gets to focus on cherishing the little moments with her grandchildren, ranging in age from 5 to 14. Of the many happy memories she has made with her grandchildren, her favorites include playing “tickle monster” with her granddaughter every night before bed and watching all of them blossom over the years. “It’s a joy to be around them and a joy to watch them grow. I’m getting to get all the good stuff, all the good times with them.”
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